[[!template id=lexeme lexeme="Obsequious address" pos=n]]
(also __obsequy__, though this is highly non-[standard
usage](http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/obsequy)). During a regular Philo
meeting, the would-be speaker delivers an address which will sway the
[[Moderator]] to allow him/her to approach the [[podilectern]]. Usually
an obsequious address highlights the awesomeness of the Moderator,
but you must tread carefully! Remember: references to light, might, or
height are considered trite. So if you're trite, forget about approaching
the podilectern to give your speech (unless you're the [[Avatar]], of
course). Also, remember to always end your obsequious address by saying
"May I approach yon podilectern?" (It's not a podium and it's not a
lectern: it's a podilectern!)
 
Additionally: Sexequies -- or obsequies which make lewd suggestions
or other comments of sexual nature involving the Moderator -- are
frowned upon. *N.B. This constraint was saliently relaxed during the
[[Schmonzerator's|schmonz]] tenure.* However, if you are [[Mr. Van
Sant|Ian VanSant]], if you strip like Mr. Van Sant, or if the Moderator
thinks you're as hot as Mr. Van Sant, you will be allowed to deliver your
sexequy to a receptive Moderator and audience, and will subsequently be
allowed to approach the podilectern.